Jun 27
How Proud Now?

A new study reports that Texas is a pathetic, third-world, poverty-stricken state. Shocked? So were we. I mean,Governor Perry is so proud of Texas we were wondering how he could be proud that

  • Texas has the highest percentage of uninsured children in the country, 21 percent. The national average is 11 percent.
  • Almost half of Texas children lived in low-income families in 2004. That's an income below $38,314 for a family of four.
  • Texas' infant mortality rate and the percentage of babies with low birth weights increased between 2000 and 2003. The state ranks 22nd in the nation on both.

    • When it comes to children's well-being, Texas ranked 39th overall in the study. Sitting here, overlooking the park and still drinking coffee from a beautiful antique china coffee cup in my Italian suit I find it hard to imagine being poor. Do you think you'd have to shop at Joseph A. Banks instead of Brooks Brothers? What do poor people eat? I bet it's that instant Macaroni and Cheese stuff. Ew. Why do people have to be so poor? It's sad but gross. They should get jobs or something because I bet they stink.

    This reminds me of the single most offensive joke I've ever heard in my life. Click the permalink if you think you've got the stomach for it.

    Q: You know what's better than fucking an 8 year old?
    A: Nothing

    PinkDome at 10:03 AM
     
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    Comments

    I'm pretty sure poor people eat other poor people. At least Colbert told me so.

    Fine Bottled Water at June 27, 2006 10:19 AM

    Oh good. Cause I bet that Macaroni and Cheese stuff tastes like shit.

    Pinkdome at June 27, 2006 10:32 AM

    Most disgusting joke ever?

    Q: What does it taste like to eat out an 80yo pussy?
    A: Depends

    BacchusXY at June 27, 2006 10:35 AM

    More and more poor children? Great! We could always use more fast-food workers, dishwashers and lawn workers. After all, is not the goal to become a new Brazil?

    gayinmidland at June 27, 2006 11:04 AM

    Remember: You can be proud of Texas, without being proud of Rick Perry.

    (Although I am *damn* proud of his hair. It represents Texas well. (On the other hand, I'd have to say he's all hair and no policy. (But perhaps I digress. (Or...not.))))

    incognito in austin at June 27, 2006 1:19 PM

    We can't truly be Brazil until we learn how to play soccer. It's required. Even their poorest kids can beat our butts on the pitch.

    sabestian at June 27, 2006 4:45 PM

    Disgusting Joke #1:
    What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable?

    Getting them back into the wheelchair.

    Disgusting Joke #2:
    Have you heard about the new varsity sport at Texas A&M?

    Squash. (or log rolling)

    cynical optimist at June 28, 2006 8:08 AM
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