I guess the U.S. has taken a new route in the war on terror: snark and, like, super embarrassing videos.
Earlier today, Maj. Gen. Rick Lynch showed clips from the unedited version of last week's Abu Musab al-Zarqawi video. Apparently, U.S. forces found the full video during a raid in a town south of Baghdad.
When Lynch showed the video to reporters today, he did the military's version of Mystery Science Theater 3000 by adding snide remarks about Zarqawi's shooting skills:
They "do things like grab the hot barrel of a machine gun and burn themselves," Lynch said, narrating the video to reporters."Here's Zarqawi, the ultimate warrior, trying to shoot his machine gun. It's supposed to be automatic fire. He's shooting single shots one at a time. Something's wrong with his machine gun. He looks down, can't figure it out. He calls his friend to unblock the stoppage and get the weapon firing again."
...
Lynch said the images he showed indicate that al-Zarqawi "tends to have a problem" with mastering his own weapons system and with finding capable and competent aides."Why he's their leader, I don't know."
Zarqawi was unavailable for comment, as he had locked himself in the bathroom while crying and WASN'T GOING TO COME OUT UNTIL NEVER.
Yeah, I've known more than one guy who had a problem mastering his weapon.
Isn't there medication for that?
btw, he looks like he has makeup on in that picture -- blush, eyeshadow -- did you photoshop that, PD?
I did. That was my attempt at making him look embarrassed - like he was blushing. I also scrunched up his eyebrows and made him frown.
Clearly it didn't work. :)
Sorry, SuperWow, didn't read the byline. That was you! It certainly did work. Love it.
Its a tad gay. But, hey I'm Trey loves it.
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at May 4, 2006 4:12 PM
Wonk = Trey? Now I'm even more confused.
Certainly not. I'm saying Trey is a fan of men of wear make up.
Get it?
Wonk, I seriously think you have a grammatical error in every single comment.
Well hey.....thanks for noticing.
at May 4, 2006 7:30 PM
I've certainly admired Rick Perry's makeup. FLAWLESS.
Yours on the other hand, Wonk, could use some work. And you really need to stop using that cheap ass maybelline shit. Chanel's all over the place now so there's no excuse.
At last---a foe worthy of George Dubya.
Look up the letters from the "Zarkman" in Iowahawk.com. I know you guys don't usually look into a rightwing blog, but these are really well written...before you read them, remove all liquids from the vicinity of your keyboard.
aynyae
But it's so big and heavy.... What's a girl to do?