And what's the deal with the Leadership? They can't lead, and they're not driving a ship. What's going on there? And has anyone tried opening the peanuts on airplanes?

Okay, so a baptist, a jew, and a catholic walk into a bar...

I wonder if they notice that I'm like a deer caught in headlights........

Listen, you little 8 year old snot-nosed piece of monkey crap, the only reason I come to these elementary school forums is to chase teacher skirts. So quit whining about needing to go potty or I'll kick the fuck out of you!

"I'm sexy, I'm cute, I'm popular to boot..."

"So the doctor had me change into one of those paper robes. He comes into the room, grabs my balls and asks me to cough. I said what the F, I just have a sore throat.

The last time I told a joke, Andy Brown started using it....

"squeek, squeek squeek. Squeek!"

Has anyone seen my twin brother Patrick in the crowd?

I'm not gay, I'm not, I'm not! ANd why the hell am I on Radnosky's friggin' blog? Now I'll have Kay Hutchison after my ass and I have enough trouble as it is.

Can't a guy get a friggin' break?

I did it MYYYY WAYYYYYYYYY!

I'm a bottom.

...And, it was like you could literally see Craddick doing that Darth Vader choking thing on Dewhurst!

I'm running for Congress in District 10 because...